summertime ’s dead , which means it ’s time to focus on work and work . Which means you ’re start to be surrounded by friends . And strangers . And strangers who might someday be friends . Oh , but what if they wo n’t ? Let ’s creep ’em out .
People cogitate they ’re safe in the dark . They think they ’re individual . They ’re not . Use the diminutive Midnight Shot tv camera to snap infrared pictures from the phantasma . People who think they ’re not being watched . Oh , but they are . You ’re never safe in the infrared spectrum . And then netmail them the pic . That ’d be nice and creepy , now would n’t it ? $ 150
Before we go any further , let ’s ensure you calculate the part . Do you have a creepy mustache ? Like a really creepy-crawly one ? One that would get shocked looks , and keep you from being invited to birthday parties ? No ? That ’s ok — foot up one of these fakes for cheap . Nice and bristly . Stache man . Or stache womanhood . $ 10
Pick up this shirt too . Imagine someone wearing this shirt and a phony ‘ stache . That ’d be real good and creepy . $ 12
go away voicemail is a lot of playfulness . “ Hello , I ’d wish to smack your hair atop Mount Everest . I ’m draw a picture of you with crayon . Goodnight . ” That ’s a fun substance to leave . But if they witness out it ’s you , all the playfulness ’s over ! So mask your vocalism like a professional with the Professional Voice Changer . feeling , gender , rake , octave , and reverb are all adjustable , and there are 50 presets you may save , for your 50 different personalities . $ 550
These Celestron binoculars have a 15x zoom , but more importantly , a tripod mount . You ’ll need it for those Overnight Peek Parties . $ 60
Now what happens if you meet a friend while being a creep ? A friend you want to be around all the clip . You desire to hear everything they say . You need to hear them cough , and sneeze , and hum , and pipe dream . Oh , but they must n’t see you ! Then all the merriment would be over . The Magic Ear impart you a 50 decibel boost , for pinpointed eavesdropping . What ’s that ? You get it on me back ? $ 40
Top photo : Christophe Testi / Shutterstock
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